Mormon Mom Minivan Madness

I have a pet peeve, and it's Mormon Moms in Minivans(In Rexburg). I will refer to the above as "MMMM" for simplicity from here on out.

During the cold winter months, I drop Amelia off at school. So does everyone else in a 12 block radius. Normally it's a simple, in-and-out process.....as long as you get there before the MMMM.

As you know, Rexburg is a family community, and being so has an enormous number of children under 10--hence an astonishing number of minivans. I began picking Amelia up across the street after I had my first brush with the MMMM at the beginning of school. As the end of the school day arrives, the front of the school is packed bumper-to-bumper with minivans. Most have the cute little stick figures of their family in the back window, or a sticker somewhere proclaiming how proud they are of their cub scout.

But they aren't the dangerous ones.

The most lethal are the Mormon Moms that are trying to manuever their vans into compact-car spaces while talking on the phone, breaking up fights between younger children THAT ARE NOT BUCKLED IN, fixing their perfectly streaked hair with their inch-long manicured nails while waving to other Mormon Moms in Minivans. They are the ones that miss side-swiping other cars (say, a small red sports car) while they are trying to multi-task.

To top it off, most are about 8 months pregnant.

Now I try not to judge (and fail most of the time), but never has my tire-gauge hand itched so much to flatten a few tires. Mostly the ones attached to Toyota Siennas and Kia Sedonas.